Saturday, December 29, 2007

10 Reasons Gay Marriage Is Wrong

01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

03) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

04) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

06) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

08) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.


Anonymous said...

cool, very cool and sarcastic. i wish everyone reads this.

Greetings from Tapachula Chiapas

Robert NEATHERLAND said...

I was pleasantly suprise at the inclusive tone of your list. T.Y.

I am not from mo. However I have relatives who live in willard, walnut grove Ava Nixa Bolivar . I am their Gay Cousin, Nephew , Brother. They hav'nt spoken to me in decades. Literally. I've been told They will have nothing to do with me as they are Christians and do not like " my kind" They stand in their churches and go on about the sanctity of family . I guess that only applies to straight family members. I still love them though . I live in Vermont, and I search the Web for pictures or stories of them . Sometimes I'm lucky and catch a glimpse of what someone looks like now in a picture I've found . I too am a Christian. I'm sure my family wouldn't agree.But, I know the Lord. I love him. And, I know that He loves me . I just wish my relatives did.I miss them. Maybe the Lord will bring us together. somehow . I pray he will.Thank you for listening . Robert Neatherland.